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The Fake Guru
Aug 25, 2022
The Agents' Retreat
“Welcome to the Eco Barefoot Hotel. Can I offer you a fresh towel and a complementary papaya juice? You’re most welcome, sir. How was...
63 views0 comments
The Fake Guru
Nov 5, 2021
The Rain Rider
Today is the big day. Well, technically tomorrow is the big day – but today is a big day too. One year ago, he’d booked his first day of...
34 views0 comments
The Fake Guru & The Fake Guru
Nov 3, 2021
The Ego
I’m hungry, It said. Feed me. Like a Devil-Baby, It nags at the back of the mind. I didn’t know what to do – and yet, I identified with...
10 views0 comments
The Fake Guru
Oct 28, 2021
An Ode to the G.O.A.T
THE CROWD CHANTS. The music fades. The curtains rise. Everyone stands and cheers as he steps into the spotlight. “Thank you. Thank you!”...
3 views0 comments
The Fake Guru
Aug 10, 2021
The Man on the Mountain
IN THE AUSTRIAN ALPS lives a wild man. To behold him in his natural habitat, one might easily mistake him for a mountain bear, for he is...
6 views0 comments
The Fake Guru
Aug 10, 2021
The Boy, the Stars and the Earthquake (or: The Satellite Mechanic - Part I)
HE WASN’T QUITE SURE WHERE THEY WERE, but he knew they were somewhere in California. His parents had told him that they’d stopped between...
5 views0 comments
The Fake Guru
Aug 10, 2021
The Man Who Claimed to be Off the Grid
ONE AFTERNOON we decided to join some friends at a pool party. The Soul Street, a gourmet street food restaurant with pool access DJ was...
3 views0 comments
The Fake Guru
Aug 10, 2021
The Writer's Block
I don’t want to write today. Can that just be the end of this essay? I guess not – but at least those sentences rhyme Don’t get your...
2 views0 comments
The Fake Guru
Aug 10, 2021
The Solitude of Thought | He / Him
HE LOOKED OUT OVER THE PALE BLUE OCEAN and dug his feet into the hot sand. Earlier in the day, he had picked up a single grain, just to...
4 views0 comments
The Fake Guru
Aug 10, 2021
The Solitude of Thought | She / Her
SHE LOOKED OUT OVER THE PALE BLUE OCEAN and dug her feet into the hot sand. Earlier in the day, she had picked up a single grain, just to...
1 view0 comments
The Fake Guru
Aug 10, 2021
The Builders
A LONG, STEEL PIPE smashes against my head with a metallic CLANG! I’m awake!! What day is it? What year is it? I look at my alarm clock....
3 views0 comments
The Fake Guru
Aug 10, 2021
The Postman
We watch the pot, waiting for it to a boil. As I pour the hot water into the French press, the bitter aroma of fresh coffee stimulates...
7 views0 comments
The Fake Guru
Aug 10, 2021
The Phoenix
ONE DAY, when I was in a time of need, the Fates reached out to me. They extended their hands in shape of a man who was further along in...
8 views0 comments
The Fake Guru
Aug 9, 2021
The Girl under the Yellow Umbrella
THE SUN BURNED in the sky. It was just past midday, and I was thankful for the cool blast of the AC in my eclectic Italian rental car....
18 views0 comments
The Fake Guru
Aug 9, 2021
The Fatalist Barber
“How short you want it?” I look into the mirror, straight into the eyes of the masked Syrian wielding a pair of razor-sharp scissors...
4 views0 comments
The Fake Guru & The Fake Guru
Aug 5, 2021
The Fake Guru
“I GOTTA GO! I’ll see you later!” He kisses her on the cheek, double checks his gear and mounts the hot-rod red YAMAHA XSR900. The engine...
18 views0 comments
The Fake Guru
Aug 4, 2021
The Evil Dick Doctor
“WHAT THE FU… - Baby! Come and look at this!” I pointed at my dick. “What is it?” “I dunno. Looks like a rash.” “How long has it been...
5 views0 comments
The Fake Guru
Aug 2, 2021
The Anti-Conspiracy Theorist
STANDING ON THE STAGE of the auditorium, the man glances anxiously at the clock. The long arm indicates seven minutes past the hour. Why...
13 views0 comments
The Fake Guru
Aug 1, 2021
The Conspiracy Theorist
THE SIGNS were all there. It was so obvious! Why did everyone refuse to see it but him? For many weeks now he’d been gathering...
2 views0 comments
The Fake Guru
Jul 30, 2021
The Dragoness
The first time we met she said: “I hate my job. You wouldn’t believe the shit that goes down where I work.” She works in finance, “so...
13 views0 comments
The Fake Guru
Jul 21, 2021
The Secret To Cheating Death Himself
We come from an old family.
A family where the values are passed on, generation over generation. A family, where responsibility is born...
3 views0 comments
The Fake Guru
Jul 1, 2021
The Entrepreneur's Dilemma
EVERYONE IS an entrepreneur nowadays. It’s true. If one were to make a data-driven analysis, I’d almost guarantee there’s been a...
14 views0 comments
The Fake Guru
Jun 28, 2021
The Morning Routine, aka. Coffee
I wake up in a fog. It's too early… Or maybe it's too late? I'm really not sure anymore. I lost my daily routine about two and a half...
6 views0 comments
The Fake Guru
May 26, 2021
An Ode To The Sun
STANDING IN A BEAM OF LIGHT, I close my eyes and think of the Sun. I think of the immense distance between us. Space. I think of myself,...
16 views0 comments
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The Fake Guru
The Agents' Retreat
“Welcome to the Eco Barefoot Hotel. Can I offer you a fresh towel and a complementary papaya juice? You’re most welcome, sir. How was...
630
The Fake Guru
The Nigerian Prince
“DEAR MR. SIR, I apologize to encroach into your privacy in this manner, but I approach you in a request for assistance regarding a...
110
The Fake Guru
The Magic Mushroom Hotel
You know what the worst thing about the hotels around the Mediterranean heel of Italy is? It's the nightly struggle with the hotel AC....
930
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